Oh, right. Now that COVID has canceled my summer season, I’ll be looking for work once again.
The thing about job hunting is that it was unpredictable before the outbreak. Now, well, I’m sure I find myself like many Americans.
But hey, opportunity from adversity! Good luck to all, and to all a good night.
Apparently, some blog posts have evaporated. While I was traveling and setting up posts for the trip, some scheduled items didn’t appear to post.
Sorry about that.
Anyway, new updates to follow, including some adventures back in Atlanta!
“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.”
– Mary Anne Radmacher
Another week without work. Another week of soul-searching. Another week of pandemic fears and of normalcy obliterated.
I’ve worked consistently in at least one job (usually two or three) since I was twenty years old. Not having to report to work has been playing mischief with my… well, my everything.
I wish I could say that I’ve stuck to the routine I established for myself while staying up in Alaska. I did not. Between traveling and avoiding people, I feel like a clandestine operative sneaking back into my own country.
Likewise, fishermen are looking at returning to Alaska, but there are concerns over whether the smaller fishing villages will be able to handle an outbreak. That means the state’s top three revenue streams (oil, tourism, and fishing) will have all suffered this year.
Back here in the lower 48, one thing I’ve noticed is my sleep schedule is currently all akimbo. I’m anxious to make it somewhere consistently and attempt to hack my sleep. That’s been my focus for much of this week.
To remove distractions while writing, I’ve been utilizing the app White Noise. Between that and my noise-canceling headphones I can usually omit any superfluous noise around me.
And, Andrew Lloyd Webber has been showing one filmed show a week, which I’ve caught a couple of. Not to mention National Theatre’s productions on YouTube. Lots of theatre to take your attention, if only for a couple of hours.
On investing your time wisely.
On starting (and keeping) a journal. I bought my first Moleskine circa 2006. While my writing was haphazard at best to start, I eventually found a rythym. In 2015, when I first began The Artist’s Way, I wrote my morning pages with a religious zeal. Admittedly, I fell off the wagon time and again, having to start anew and began collecting continuous days of writing behind from scratch. I’ve now been journaling the better part of six months daily, and have every intention of continuing.
When the smartphone starts taking over your life, here are some ways to curb its useage.
And finally, when burnout sets in, it’s time to recover.
April 2020
Books Purchased:
Books Read:
It’s been nearly two months since I’ve ventured into a book store or, longer still, a library. That’s an inordinately long time for me, someone who enjoys the smell of books – the feel of the paper and bindings.
Bookshop is a useful tool for picking up some new books and supporting local bookshops (I wrote about it more here, but I haven’t shopped online there yet).
Small sacrifices, I suppose, in favor of the common good. I dare not even try and buy something on Amazon as, a) their shipping schedules are slightly off, and, b) I’m still making my way through the country with no real address to ship to.
However, not needing to buy new books, I delved into my digital library to consume the Dresden Files books once again. I’d read the series before, starting back in maybe 2011 or 2012. Butcher is releasing not one, but two new Dresden novels this year, and I wanted to get reacquainted with the wizard detective.
In truth, there are the two collections of short stories, Brief Cases and Odd Jobs neither of which I’ve read, that I’ll likely pick up as well.
But all of my reading this month was digital. In Alaska, my roommate lent me a couple books to read, but I didn’t get into them before I had to return to the lower 48.
Next up was Vikram, a book that I discovered through an Easton Press email. A long time ago at a discount book store, I found a copy of Tad Williams’s Child of an Ancient City. I read it at some point, probably in the early- to mid-nineties. But upon seeing the email from Easton Press I could not recall the title. So I started looking.
The book, if I still have it, is somewhere in storage. I don’t have access to many of the books I own. Googling all that I remember, I slowly made progress. Finally, I identified the title.
The connection was that Vikram was an Indian raja who was told stories by a vampire spirit occupying itself with taking the time to tell stories. Ancient City also dealt with a vampire (which was in India, according to memory, but turned out to be Armenia), and storytelling in a contest to decide whether the vampire would feed entirely on the party of explorers or not.
The book was illustrated by Greg Hildebrandt of the Brothers Hildebrandt and even included an acknowledgment to Sir Richard Burton, author of Vikram and the Vampire.
Journeys was something I began reading from the Internet Archive
I’m sitting on a stack of unread books – of the digital variety now. Tools of Titans, The Very Best of Caitlín R. Kiernan, A History of Japan, Deep Work, and Slouching Towards Bethlehem. While traveling I was also hoping to listen to some audiobooks, and yet I’ve remained fairly distracted on the trip. Those that I want to listen to most are: How to Defeat a Demon King in Ten Easy Steps, The Dream-Quest of Vellitt Boe, Unconventional Success, and Washington by Ron Chernow.
There hasn’t been as much time to read since leaving Alaska. More aptly, I’ve been distracted throughout. Too much time in thought, perhaps. One of the most pervasive deterrents to my focusing has been an abundance of time. Which is not something that I thought would ever be a problem.
So, while April gave me ample opportunity to delve into the Dresden series, I’m hoping May will bring a variety of story, along with more certainty about the state of affairs within the country.
The internet is insidious. There is a scene in Ready Player One, in which Nolan Sorrento panders to the board by showing how much screen space can be covered in ads:
Our internet is a lot like that. Even reading this post, you’ll likely notice ads popping up. But if your browser has a reader view (which it should; Safari’s is in the URL bar), it’s easy enough to omit most of the distracting ads that show up.
And that’s the thing about the commercialist market. There is nowhere we find ourselves that doesn’t have someone trying to sell us something. We’ve become so used to it, the only way for them to ensure that their messages are seen is to find more and more creative ways to make them prominent – pure O2, as it were.
Why time is so distorted in our minds right now. (In all fairness, my sense of time is usually distorted, but I guess even more so now.)
With the time you have, art Critic Jerry Saltz writes on how to stay creative during isolation. It’s been a challenge for me, but not only me, and as Jason Diamond writes, “…there is still something to be taken from this: we are all lacking for sources of inspiration these days.”
Changing your routine is likely necessary right now, and here are some tips from Life Hacker.
When it’s difficult to fall asleep, try these techniques from Art of Manliness. Again, a constant problem for me which I’m trying to tackle even now.
And for when getting outside seems impossible, virtual hikes that you can enjoy from anywhere.
It doesn’t matter that we fail from time to time. In fact, we should know failure. That failure creates an opportunity to learn like no other.
If all we had known was success then we aren’t pushing ourselves. We’re doing a disservice to the world that can influence, and a disservice to our own well-being.
Certainly, I have failed. Made decisions that ran counter to my own best interests. I’ve lied, cheated, and stole. I’ve broken laws and misused trusts that were placed in me. For the pain and suffering I’ve caused I am deeply sorry. I hope that in my failure I’ve learned enough to make amends.
And still, it is my desire to do better, to be better. There aren’t many opportunities in life that don’t require the rocking of the boat from time to time. Safe sailing yields no new treasures.
So fail, then. Live openly, live truthfully, and live bravely. You’ll get knocked on your ass from time to time. But all you can do is get up, dust yourself off, and try again.
“What a bad idea…”
“Good idea, bad idea: Good idea – playing cops and robbers in the park. Bad idea – playing cops and robbers in the bank.”
“Sometimes even hearing a bad idea is a great way to get a good idea.”
There is a lot of stigma surrounding the bad idea. However, my contention is that there is no such thing. An idea can neither be good or bad because it is simply a thought. It is our own self-revisionist qualities that prevent us from accepting ideas as merely ideas.
Yes, some ideas are marketable, while others are not. Some can be brought into reality, and others, for better or worse, can not. Some are executed extremely well, while others – many others – are simply not.
But the idea remains an idea. It’s a neutral thing. It’s what we – the creators – do with them that matters.
Michael's Musings 