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Christmastime is here…

by MAÔ, posted in Holidays

Today, I’ve set up a Christmas tree, and helped with some outdoor decorations. At two houses. Neither one was mine.

And that’s great! Helping others set up for Christmas is part of getting in the spirit. It’s not a copmpetition of who has the best decor. It’s a collaboration of good tidings.

Here’s a photo of my friend’s house.

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And my big contribution was making sure that the Y in “JOY” was lit up. Before I helped, it just said “JO”.

And everything else was extension cords.

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So, even if we’re not quite to Thanksgiving yet, “Merry Christmas, you filthy animal!”

What you are

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

There’s a tendency to use the word failure as a description of a person who has failed. But people are not failures. Someone may have failed, but it does not make them a failure. Often, those who fail are persevering.

If you have a disease, you are not that illness. In the same way, if you have failed, you are not that failure.

You are who you are supposed to be. Trying, and failing, and persevering. And that is enough.

How much does one need?

by MAÔ, posted in Health

Second admission: I have too much stuff.

My last house I lived in about a 600 square foot cottage on nearly half an acre. I didn’t particularly like the house, but I loved the yard.

Moving into it, I had too much. It got crammed into nooks with no hope of me going through it. That was my fault. I hadn’t at the time learned about decluttering and minimalism. It was only when I was nearly moving out that I started getting rid of stuff. Over twenty boxes went to Goodwill, and more went in the trash. Just stuff that had accumulated.

I talk with friend about accumulation often. It’s amazing all that stuff that we keep in case we need.

Now, I’ve been without what you’d call a permanent residence for about two years. And if you’ve read the blog for a while, you know I’m a bibliophile with a penchant for acquiring new books…

But I want to live lighter. I want to live more nimbly, and more simply. With less, one is freer to travel and explore. With less, there is less to clean. Less to look through when searching for something.

How much does one need? Admittedly, much, much less than I currently have.

The challenge of letting go

by MAÔ, posted in Health

First admission: Letting go is a challenge for me.

There. I said it. Admitting it is the first step. You see, I think a very specific way. I was first alerted to differences in the way that people think while listening to a talk given by Dr. Temple Grandin. In this interview, she describes that process.

I don’t think in pictures. I think in the abstract. For me, visualization is difficult to achieve. I don’t see many pictures in my mind’s eye. I have done exercises to increase that ability, but I’ve made little progress.

But emotional context, I can recall with 100% clarity nearly in every instance. I can tell you exactly how I felt when something occurred. And because of this, I tend to attach those feelings to items that were present at specific moments… a lot of items. Which can then be complicated when trying to declutter, because items will have an emotional life. As I’m sure you can understand.

While we work through the clutter of our lives, it’s important to deal with the emotions, positive or negative, that arise as well. Otherwise we won’t change our patterns.

Checking in

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

Every once in a while it’s good to check in. How does this feel? Are you noticing any discomfort?

They tell you this in yoga, but it’s true for life as well. We go through so many days blind to the experience – just getting by. Check in. At least weekly, but daily is better.

My check-ins are scheduled on my calendar, every Sunday. Sometimes I forget them, it’s true. But I know that when I do, I can expect the week to veer off-course in unexpected ways.

When fear leads

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

There are times when doing that one thing seems so scary, it’s nearly impossible to take the first step. Fear stopping you in your tracks; leading you away from your goals.

Steven Pressfield calls this the resistance. But it has many names. Practicality. Complacency. Normalcy.

The vast majority of us are just skating by, no more sure of ourselves than any other. What we consider to be normal is that same fear leading all of us.

What happens when you give fear the backseat? What do you do? The truth is, only you can answer that. But I bet you it feels a hell of a lot better than letting fear have control.

Rearranging

by MAÔ, posted in Writing

After three years, I’ve changed my tagline. No longer am I trying to keep it together. Now it’s all about exploration. I’ll be changing the look and feel of the blog as well, though I’m still committed to daily postings.

That’s been a challenge, but one that’s kept me focused these past couple of months. I’m planning on some positive changes to complement some other of the other projects that I am working on. Hopefully I’ll have more to say on that before the end of the year.

And that’s coming up soon!

Thoughts on goal-setting

by MAÔ, posted in Pathfinding

What do you do when you’ve lost sight of the peak? You reorient. That means asking questions about what is in your life. Everything. Yes, it helps if the goal is in place so that you can compare where you are to where you want to be.

But what if you don’t really have one? Or, it’s a more simplistic, immediate goal? Let’s say you can’t quite make yourself set a five- or ten-year plan.

So start small.

You want to get out of debt? Before you make that purchase, ask yourself, “Will this bring me closer to that goal?”

Unless it’s a business purchase to increase revenue or start a new venture, or some financial investment to increase returns, it’s a hard no. We know this. That’s why this goal in particular can be so difficult. You’d never buy anything!

(Obviously this won’t apply to monthly bills, or things like groceries. But make sure you have a budget and stick to it.)

One other issue that arises is when two goals seem to contradict each other. For instance, debt reduction vs. buying a new house. But if you remain focused on the steps, you can reduce your revolving debt – which will lead to a better rate on your mortgage.

And that’s all it is. A goal is a road-map. Stick to the map, achieve the goal. Then set a new one.

Weekly roundup

by MAÔ, posted in Social

Well, here we are again. Another week down, another week closer to 2020. And what the hell have I been doing with my life?!

Not important…. Here’s my week:

What I’m reading: Still on Dracula. I’m about two-thirds of the way done. I only read for about an hour before bed, because I’ve been hard at work on a few other projects. Dracula has stood out to me for some time – a book that I should have read. I’m glad I’m finally getting it done. I also found my paperback edition, purchased in the early-nineties for fifty cents. I’ve seen the theater where Bram Stoker worked, for God’s sake. And I’m just now reading it. Sometimes I question my priorities.

What I’m listening to: La Nozze di Figaro. The opera by Mozart. I’m going to be in New York and Pennsylvania in a couple of weeks, and I thought it would be fun to see a show at the Met. Because, in all the times I’ve been to New York, I’ve never been to the Met for a performance. I’ve toured it. Had my photo taken in the lobby. But, you know… Priorities. Anyway, this production brings back Luca Pisaroni and Adam Plachetka, reversing the roles of Figaro and Count Almaviva. Needless to say, I’m looking forward to it.

What I’m spending time with: This acting workbook my friend Anthony and I have been going over. I took a lot of time over the past two days to look through it again. I’ve got maybe a couple hours worth of work left, but I’m excited that it is so near completion. I’ll post links once I can get it up for sale.

Other things of interest:

  • Why retiring might mean never having to grow up.
  • As only a random watched of Courage the Cowardly Dog, I do recall laughing. A lot. But I don’t remember it being overly scary…
  • HBO’s His Dark Materials. I hate to say that I’m mostly waiting for the armored bear, but I’m mostly waiting for the armored bear. And Lin Manuel. But I really want him to finish his work on the Name of the Wind adaptation!
  • Speaking of Lin Manuel, the Drama Book Shop is set to reopen in the spring!
  • And lastly, because this was heavily slanted towards performance and acting, something that caught my eye dealing with none of that! Yoga… the cure for insomnia.