Category: Thoughts

The lives we live

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

I wonder how many of us shape the life that we truly want. The sheer presence of choices in how we do our daily lives – jobs, housing, spouse or SO, children, etc. – a simpler time (maybe one or two-hundred years ago) was simpler to navigate.

Choice. I know I’ve written about choice before. But, it’s true that our brain can only handle a finite number of actual decisions per day. Higher weight decisions cost more of our choice capital than choosing between coffee and tea. But the more we can automate or days, the more capital we have to make the weightier decisions.

It’s not just work either. It’s health. It’s finances. It’s relationships.

I started watching the Marie Kondo series on Netflix. I had read the book some time ago, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up. I’m not sure if it was pre or post-shake up in my life. Surprisingly, that altered more than just my decision-making abilities. I digress.

The couple in the first episode have one minor relationship issues. Bickering. Picking at faults perceived in the other. The capital for choice is being used stressing about house, and poor decisions are made when addressing each other.

Limiting the mess, the clutter – freeing capital – allows more data to be processed from a framework of less stress. Less stress in itself frees capital, because the mind isn’t fighting the basic fight or flight choice impulse and hormone secretions. Freeing the mind from material restraints opens up your true potential.

It’s for this. Reason the Buddha taught that desire leads to suffering. Material possessions are as a rock in a bottle floating in the sea. After so many rocks, the bottle can no longer remain afloat. It is imperative that we mindfully cultivate our possessions, and use the choice capital we have in the most productive outputs possible.

Fah-who For-aze

by MAÔ, posted in Poetry

Welcome Christmas, come this way…

Christmas, oh Christmas.

A cold and desolate season welcomes you
to bring light, cheer, warmth and hope.

The Christmas-season is a belief,
more than it is a holiday.
More than the celebration of the messiah,
or the de facto creation of a religion.

Christmas is the embodiment of all love,
and charity becoming manifest.
That the most can provide for the least
to express nothing more than care.

There can be giving without gain,
Hope without loss,
Peace without harm,
And love without the expectation of reward.

When the Christians appropriated the
customs around the Winter Solstice,
they honored the themes of light;
of fire, charity and feasting.

Bringing about the new days,
each with longer hours of sun.
“The old has passed away.
Behold, the new has come!”

So Christmas, today and all days,
Fill us with the passion to remember love.
To remember charity,
and to provide for those less fortunate.

It isn’t in celebrating a day,
the 25th of December,
but celebrating the season
throughout the whole year that is Christmas.

Going forward

by MAÔ, posted in Writing

For the time being, committing to one day a week blog posting. Probably Mondays.

Feeling slightly reinvigorated after several weeks of lethargy and, to be honest, mild depression. I think the season sometimes weighs on me. Later this month will be the eight-year anniversary of the crash that took my grandmother. One of the defining moments of my life, and I believe that each year brings some relief, but with it new challenges.

I wanted to write about Halloween, and will later. A bit of a post mortem (no pun intended). I think it’s one of my favorite holidays, but I’m such a fan of most holidays that it’s hard to choose one favorite (Thanksgiving is one I’m on the fence about).

A couple other future posts include one on horror movies, the long-awaited reading lists (RA Salvatore, Patrick Rothfuss, and Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa, to name a few), The Adventure Zone, my experiences in radio broadcasting, and some various theatrical experiences.

So, I’ll leave it there for today. I’ve started writing my morning pages again, a la Julie Cameron. When the seasonal affectations begin, it’s sometimes difficult to maintain focus. But, as has happened in the past, I slack off, then I pick back up. This is my meandering thought process anyway, and I find it best to write when the mind necessitates it.

Some time away

by MAÔ, posted in Writing

Took time away from writing. From reading. Mostly.

Stepped away from commitments, to focus more on myself.

Still not quite there.

Work has been a large part of my time. As has some volunteer activities. Eight weeks devoted to the musical Little Women, followed by three weekends of Jekyll & Hyde the musical.

I’m tired. I feel like I’m not resting enough. And my mind swirls all the time.

Next month I’ll be in Costa Rica for a week. Hopefully that will be enough refreshing time. Either way, it’s time to get back to work.

 

 

 

Growth mindset

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

The world is not a zero sum game. We all work towards our own self interest, but not necessarily at the expense of another’s goals.

Ask yourself – is what you’re doing benefiting only you? If it is, look for methods to include others. Collaborate. Expand.

When you and another work towards common betterment, the collaborative effect is greater then the sum of its parts.

1 + 1 ≤ 3

Untitled

by MAÔ, posted in Poetry

A freckled face was her distress,
You’d think her own, but you’d be wrong.
She’d swear up and down she’d ate enough,
That all was well, but don’t they all?

Beneath the surface she hides the truth
Of years of pain and loss.
She wore her smile like a shield,
A shield that shine in the sun’s warmth.

Then, alone, the smile would fade.
Sometimes tears, and other times,
Silence.

Years had passed, and still
Time did little to ease her suffering.
A hidden hurt that no one could know.
The mirror was her enemy then,

Unable to look at the her looking back.
But from that, those knowing eyes
Piercing inward, her stomach could not take it.
She swore she ate enough.

And looking up, she’d wash her face.
Her freckles would spark those moments.
Alone, she smiles. A sad smile.

It doesn’t take long for it to fade.
Tears. Or silence.
She hates the silence.
And she misses that face.

Stop throwing grenades

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

I know in the past I have talked about energy in life, that can be used as a grenade or as a rocket. If the two were to have the same amount of potential force, the grenade’s footprint would be a spherical area, relatively small.

The rocket, on the other hand, would have a singular trajectory, propelled a much greater distance.

How can we direct our energy towards that one singular point?

Goals. Without goals, all we’re doing is lobbing grenades. A grenade makes a quick, forceful impact, but you’re limited in scope.

The rocket gets you places.

On personal struggles

by MAÔ, posted in Advice

A volunteer situation shed some light on a personal situation recently, as well as the significance of those “gut decisions”.

In the volunteering situation, there was an issue of some debate over a matter of a money shortage. First off, I knew that something felt wrong, but I couldn’t quite articulate what about it was off. The perception I had was incorrect, but not for the reason it actually was.

It was shortsighted of me to not explore all possibilities, but the one assumption I had fit so perfectly I couldn’t get past it. Only when I stopped, and investigated where the money wasn’t adding up did I realize – look in a separate bucket. Thus, the shortage was resolved. The two issues were unrelated, though occurring at once.

Thus, when trying to facilitate a family matter I did my best to explore other possibilities. Unfortunately this family member that I was trying to help was unwilling to stop and investigate, maintaining her assumptions and ostracizing herself.

We all go through those times when we believe something so fervently that we are unable to explore any other rationale. But, there may be two issues overlapping, and even when have a gut feeling (often a true intuitive instinct), we may be blind to that secondary issue – preventing us from coming to the best possible outcome.

Under the wire

by MAÔ, posted in Writing

Typing in bed, as I realize that I didn’t finish my monthly reading report. And the clock is ticking down to midnight. And I needed to post something asap.

Been busy, of course. But that’s not the reason for the delay. It’s just been an interesting month for books – this past July. (Are we in August already? What the Hell happened? It seems just yesterday that I was ringing in 2018…)

So, as I countdown to a new midnight, and a new day (if not a new year), I’m reminding myself, and all thirty-five of you readers, to get out there and do the work! Even if sometimes you’re not sure at all what the Hell you’re doing!

Heat

by MAÔ, posted in Poetry

The energy of the Universe,
The speed of particles hurling through space –
Through our planet, our trees, our bodies:
Fire within and without.

One spark ignites, blazing hot,
Turning all form to ash.
That which fire does not burn:
time tends to that destruction.

If fire is the giver and taker of life,
Time is the doler of justice,
for time of life or fire.
And what is left cannot burn.

Heat is the awaiting combustion,
A creative and elemental force,
Unbridled in its curiosity and fervor –
Ever wandering in and among our spirit.

We feel the temperature of the sun;
the burns of flame and fire.
We know the warmth of summer’s day
and the safe enclosures in winter’s heart.

But so few have accessed the heat of creation,
The first flames licking life into mud and stone.
Those with such knowledge are genius,
or madmen, for it is blessing or curse.

Many more seek it, not knowing.
Asking question after question,
Hoping to receive an answer.
Not knowing they ask the question to the answer.

Seek, and ye shall find.
Knock and it shall be opened.
Who knows the way to Cold Mountain?
What do you carry with you, other than yourself?

Heat burns – can give or take.
But it is only the essence.
It is only everything, as it is nothing.
Those who speak know not; who know, speak not.