Your reluctance is showing

Sometimes it feels like a small failing. This pressing urge to create that, once left unanswered, the self-fulfilling prophecy of non-creation comes true.

And yes, I’ve been reluctant to resume my blogging habit. Honestly, any writing at all has been pushed to the side. I don’t really have an excuse, other than once the routine is broken, it’s inordinately difficult for me to jumpstart it again.

So, sitting down to write, I look at the pile of notes I’ve made in the past few months. A wealth of thoughts – things to consider, rabbit holes to explore. This is my point of exploration, and the resumption of the journey that I wish to take.

It’s difficult for me to accept that it’s been since April since I’ve posted anything. Last year was bereft of the external, this year seems to reverse towards the internal. And what I notice is that, there is something missing.

For someone who searches, which I believe myself to be, a balance must be struck between the external and the internal. Pushing one or the other to the side for so long will inevitably result in downfall or a breakdown, both of which I’ve been susceptible to in the past.

All that to say, here I am once again. I don’t know what this habit will look like. But I expect at least weekly musings on many topics, and hopefully a bit more stability in my life going forward.

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